MYTHS ABOUT LIFE AS A SINGLE PERSON
"Aren't You Lonely?"
Having lived on my own for over ten years I could have happily retired on my earnings by now if I'd charged every inquirer a dollar for each time I've been asked this question.
I have come to realise that most people are not comfortable within their own skin. Indeed it is the need for company rather than having love for the person that keeps a large number of relationships together.
I have known, and know of many people in partnership, who are alone - trapped - unable to share themselves "out of respect" to their partners.
They are the same people who envy the freedom of singles to "do as they please".
"People are happier when they are partnered".
I have lost count of the number of times I have heard people say they will "find someone nice for you to be with" - generally tagged by " to make you happier".
I am always tempted to respond with the equally absurd suggestion that those who are partnered should leave their relationship "and become happier" because my experience is that partnerships compromises the ability to establish close friendships - those in which confidences may be exchanged.
I think most people in partnerships would find my suggestion offensive.
Unfortunately those same people do not appreciate the offence created by their assumption that partnership is a more desirable status than that of being single.
The reality is that people are either happy or unhappy.
Neither being in a partnership, or by being on your own, will make you happy.
Happiness is just a state of mind for each of us to choose.
"We were made to live as couples"
This is a common mantra at wedding ceremonies - a message of reassurance without any evidence of fact - the vast majority of people in the world are single.
There can be little doubt that procreation requires that couples have to spend some time together but that is a far cry from the commitment of living together.
Our moral code, derived probably from age old concerns about health and the spread of disease, doesn't easily accommodate the idea of uncommitted sexual behaviour.
CHOOSING A SINGLE PARTNER FOR LIFE HAS AS MUCH TO COMMEND AS HAVING YOUR FAVOURITE CEREAL EACH MORNING FOR BREAKFAST.